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The Morning After Thrill Returns and Quidditch! |
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Written by Katie Derbyshire
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Wednesday, 19 January 2011 02:18 |
Seeing as how Halloween fell on a Sunday this year, the Campus People Watchers pulled a day long watch-a-thon. The group began by meeting at McDonald’s at 9am to watch students make the walk of shame in costume. For those outside of the scientific community, the “walk of shame” is the walk home after a night of hardcore partying and debauchery. “What makes this day really special is usually the walk of shame doesn’t involve costumes!” said Campus People Watcher Treasurer Becca Nichols. The event was made most special by the sighting of several scantily clad men with smeared makeup all over their faces. Details were difficult to pick up by the group, as everyone was walking very quickly. “We think they are walking faster because it is cold,” said Sean, a general member, “that and they are humiliated by who they fooled around with last night.” The Watchers admit that this is one of the more questionable events they have done… thus they decided to do it again this year. The last time was in 2008. “I think it was better this year than last time, but turnover is so high in this group I actually wasn’t even in the club” remarked the people watcher’s historian. The second event of the day was the muggle quidditch national qualifier. There were four teams that the watchers watched, and four matchers. If you’ve never seen people play quidditch you really ought to because it was AWESOME! People run around with brooms between their legs and throw balls at each other – a perfect game for Halloween. Unfortunately, the team favored by Campus People Watchers, the green team with some fancy wizard name, was vanquished by the big, strong, mean tempered maroon team. What truly makes the outcome sorrowful is that David Shaffer, President of Campus People Watchers, wagered all of the remaining funds on the green team. “This is a made up sport so I figured the ‘1-60 chance’ my bookie mentioned was made up too,” Shaffer remarked before adding, “I’ve embezzled three times as much as we lost today, so it’s really no big deal.”
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4th Annual Mall of America Scavenger Hunt |
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Written by Peter
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Saturday, 12 February 2011 19:32 |
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 This past Saturday marked the return of the infamous Campus People Watchers Scavenger Hunt at the Mall of America. This year had one of the biggest turnouts, with well over three times the usual number of usual attending members. After arriving at the Mall by way of overcrowding the light rail system, teams were selected dodgeball-style, with the club officers acting as picking captains.
 The teams split up throughout and began their hunt for the prize and glory of being the true masters of the art of people watching. A list of specific people to be watched was pre-established, with the only requirement being that a photo be taken of each spotted eyesore. These ranged from Harry Potter lookalikes to the campus people watcher trademark kids on leashes. Surprisingly (and sadly), at least four kids on leashes were spotted throughout the area.
Everyone reconvened a few hours later to tally up their bounties. The winning team as well as some of the pictorial eye-candy will be uploaded and posted shortly. The event proved to once again be a total hit as well as a blast for everyone, offering only high expectations for next year. |
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Written by Katie Derbyshire
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Tuesday, 29 September 2009 15:55 |
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Background: Last year one of the greatest psychological experiments took place throughout the entirety of the mall area on campus, but the event organizers were not the Campus People Watchers. The event I write of is, of course, the campus wide “freeze.” For those that are unaware of what a freeze is you should follow this link ( http://youtube.com/watch?v=uiqea9uechs) for a visual definition. Needless to say, we here at CPW were envious of the success of the event, and so when we heard about another freeze that was to take place this September we decided it was of the utmost import to alter the freeze in some way or another. We decided the best approach to altering the freeze would be to actually get the frozen people to - for lack of a better word – melt; furthermore, we decided to find out what the best way to make people melt is. Our only criteria for our experiment was that we people watchers weren’t allowed to touch, slander, or hurt any of the frozen.   Results: We had a lot of success getting the frozen to crack and melt. Some of the best melting agents were shoving gram crackers into people’s teeth until they started chewing, placing magic the gathering cards and/or fruit on people, and post-it noting people’s faces. This watcher had some success and irritating some people who may or may not have been frozen by turning the pages that they appeared to be reading, and by fiddling with whatever props they were using to add to their frozen appearance.  Conclusion: All in all we decided that the best melting agent of all had to be what one person who wasn’t even a part of campus people watchers tried. This little boy started screaming at the top of his lungs, yelling how the world was going to end, how everyone was frozen, and how he missed his mother. It got many of the frozen to start laughing, and as the CPW Chairman of Ethics, Scott Luisi, put it “the best way to get people to melt is to be loud and awkward” – something we here at CPW are professionals at. |
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Last Updated ( Saturday, 07 January 2012 20:58 )
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Written by Katie Derbyshire
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Thursday, 07 October 2010 19:43 |
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People Watching Recommendation: Gopher Chauffeur
Back in the caveman days, students looking to get around campus on Fridays and Saturdays between the hours of 10 pm and 2 am were forced to walk. Rain, wind, ice and snow could hinder these excursions and keep students trapped indoors. This all changed one day when a new hope emerged from the woodwork: The MSA Express. It was a beacon of hope to those weary travelers that wished to journey around the U and the surrounding neighborhoods. A van would arrive at their door and whisk them away to their destination. Drunk and sober students alike rejoiced. The name has now changed to the Gopher Chauffeur, but the concept remains the same.
Not only is this wonderful service great for traveling students, but it is also fantastic for people watchers. Being an employee myself, I get my weekly people watching done in a span of a few hours. While other locations may yield similar people watching, nothing is the same at the GC. Every night is a new adventure. The drunk and the sober both produce wonderful stories that amuse and delight both the workers and the people riding the van. Top notch people watching can be found every night in the GC. CPW’s own Joey Cronick decided to people watch for himself one day as he rode in my van for an hour. The stories he left that van with were priceless. You will always see the most diverse groups of people riding the van together, laughing, telling stories and all around just being interesting. From people jamming out to old school Britney Spears, to drunk kids crying about the fact someone stole their feet from them, there are always entertaining people to see.
For excellent people watching, I highly recommend riding the Gopher Chauffeur one evening, for a truly unforgettable evening. Give us a call at 612-388-6911 on Fridays and Saturdays from 10-2 and we will pick you up. Just remember some basic rules: Be polite, don’t puke and enjoy every moment of the people watching.
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Last Updated ( Thursday, 07 October 2010 19:44 )
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